* Some mermaids are sweet, and super easy to work with. But the 'Nauti Mermaids' write their own scripts, and I can only do so much as their Land Rep.

Per their pirate-savvy union code, they flat-out refuse to wear scalloped pasties. However, they did agree to wear a 'Boyfriend's shirt' of the puffed-sleeved style, the Captain's vest (not buttoned or laced), or a boa of sargassum on occasion, but only when asked nicely and a dress code is strictly required.

I've tried to explain that the boyfriend's shirt does very little when wet, but it's their rules — they have centuries of experience and a long history of luring men into the azure depths — so I have very little wiggle room.
 

Let me know if you'd like for me to try to negotiate on your behalf.